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Metempsychosis

by Won-Ji Lee

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Go on Youtube and search “my depression.” Thousands of results appear with different people documenting their most personal yet painful experiences with surviving just one day after the other. Every one’s story is different: fathers battling cancer, young adults dealing with severe anxiety, women that had been abused as children. As they expressed their every intimate emotion and thought in these video journals, I realized that I had never felt anything so visceral, so real. There was no boundaries, no stupid social filter. Every pause in their speech, every exalted sigh, every uttered word is just pure, raw human emotion – emotion that movies and TV shows can only try to emulate and that most people will rarely encounter in their lives.

These were real people out there in the world. Some had committed suicide or died after making these video journals, but all I could remember them by, is through these trapped, tormented moving images of them. And I couldn’t do anything about it.

I had to do deal with it somehow, even if it was even just in my mind.

For the people who have passed away, I tried to make something beautiful, grandiose, and magnificently ethereal but peaceful to replace what I imagined to be a distressing and painful death for them. Using the actual voices of some of these individuals, I composed a symphony using organ, piano, a string ensemble, and some electronic synthesizer components.

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released April 13, 2014

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DJ1G San Diego, California

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